Food For Thought: When Relationships End

What happens when relationships no longer serves the greater good in our lives? Sometimes we are able to extricate ourselves from those relationships in an easy manner, and other times those relationships will end with drama and pain.

But, even when a relationship ends with drama and pain, there is a still a way to redeem that rough ending, by making the choice to wish the other person well in the future. It’s not always easy to feel that way after your feelings have been hurt, but, I guarantee it is a much healthier way to move on, than carrying about anger, hurt and pain.

Anger, hurt and pain over failed relationships can drag us down. Holding on to grudges create toxic energy in our bodies that can manifest in a host of different physical and emotional symptoms. 

Many years ago, when I was in the early days of spiritual quest for inner peace, after suffering from compound or complex grief, I found a lot of answers in the my questions and search for inner peace, in the simple but powerful acts of forgiveness, acceptance, compassion and understanding. These principles are the cornerstones of my life.

Although I may not always come from these stances, I strive to do so and recognize that each are a practice that I must work at daily. Many years ago, I learned a mantra of sorts from Marianne Williamson that has served me well when I have ended difficult relationships: “I forgive you _______, and release you to the Holy Spirit.” This forgiveness mantra is based on the teaching of A Course in Miracles.

I’m not a religious person, I am a spiritual person, who sees the beauty in the light that exists in various spiritual practices. Life is hard, change is inevitable. People come and go from our lives and sometimes we feel justifiable sadness. Still, in the end, I have always found that the sooner I can say to that person who is no longer in my life, “Good luck, I wish you well. I wish you love and light and success in all you do,” I feel far better about ending a relationship that doesn’t fit my life any longer, than I would if I carried around resentment.

Life is short… Be kind to one another.

Namaste, Pamela

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