A deep contemplation today from J. Krishnamurti…

Awareness of outward things

If you are aware of outward things—the curve of a road, the shape of a tree, the colour of another’s dress, the outline of the mountains against a blue sky, the delicacy of a flower, the pain on the face of a passerby, the ignorance, the envy, the jealousy of others, the beauty of the earth—then, seeing all these outward things without condemnation, without choice, you can ride on the tide of inner awareness. Then you will become aware of your own reactions, of your own pettiness, of your own jealousies. From the outward awareness, you come to the inward; but if you are not aware of the outer, you cannot possibly come to the inner… When there is inward awareness of every activity of your mind and your body; when you are aware of your thoughts, of your feelings, both secret and open, conscious and unconscious, then out of this awareness there comes a clarity that is not induced, not put together by the mind. ~~ J. Krishnamurti: The Collected Works vol XV p 243

What do you see when you look around you… And how do you feel when you see it… I believe that “ride on the tide of inner awareness” we must see everything with an open heart that radiates love.

(Photo: Young Mute Swans at the Artichoke River Reservior ~ c. Pamela J. Leavey 2012)

I’ve been charting rough seas for a few weeks now and I keep looking for a break from the many storms that have been thrown my way, financial, physical and given the first two, emotional as well. It’s been one of those times in life that no matter how hard you try, you just feel like it’s tough to get a break.

I’ve always believed in the power of positive thought and intent but sometimes even within a daily practice of affirmations, gratitude and prayers, you still feel as though the sea is tossing you from side to side.

Still, there are moments as each day passes by, that I see the light at the end of the tunnel. There is a reflection of light so wonderous, that it fills me with the necessary strength to push through the rough seas…

(Photo: Reflection on the Salt Marsh ~ c. Pamela J. Leavey 2011)

Taken earlier this month at the Parker River National Wildlife Refuge… A Rough Legged Hawk in flight…

Sitting at my desk today, watching the rain pour down on the Merrimack River, I wish I could be like this lovely raptor, in flight.

(Photo: Rough Legged Hawk in Flight ~~ c. Pamela J. Leavey 2012)

Reflections…

As I have mentioned here previously, it’s not easy for me to stay down. I’m working hard at this time to “be in the moment and go with the flow” although going with the flow, feels quite a bit like swimming upstream… or worse, being caught up in a whirlpool.

I have plenty of time right now for inner reflection… As the universe has grounded me for a while. Given the fact that I’m stuck at home unable to drive I’m reading 3 wonderful books that I would recommend for anyone who’s looking to read good “food for thought” books:

• Untie the Strong Woman: Blessed Mother’s Immaculate Love for the Wild Soul ~~ Clarissa Pinkola Estes
• The Gift of Change: Spiritual Guidance for Living Your Best Life ~~ Marianne Williamson
• Beyond Religion: Ethics for a Whole World ~~ His Holiness The Dalai Lama

I somehow missed reading Marianne Williamson’s The Gift of Change when it was first published a few years ago. I’ve long been a fan of Marianne’s books and lectures. Early in my years spent living in Los Angeles, I frequently went to her lectures at the Wilshire Ebell in the ’90′s. Reading it now comes to me at a profound time of change. It’s helped to re-mind me of many of the spiritual lessons I have learned over the years studying A Course In Miracles, Buddhism, Shamanism and the Goddess.

Women Who Run with the Wolves was published around the time I started to seek out spiritual knowledge, particularly focused on the Goddess and female Shamanism at the time. Clarissa Pinkola Estes long awaited new book, Untie the Strong Woman does not disappoint. I’m not far into Untie the Strong Woman yet… I will try to write more about it, as I am reading it.

Last night, I just lightly began to delve in the Dalai Lama’s new book, Beyond Religion: Ethics for a Whole World and so far I’m loving the message.

We all need to take time in our lives to reflect on our lives and free ourselves from past ties that bind us. It’s about slowing down and listening to the messages that the universe has for us… Often seen in reflections if you slow down enough to look at them.

On the Parker River Path, the vista is in constant flux… much like our own lives…

(Photo: Parker River National Wildlife Refuge ~~ c. Pamele J. Leavey 2011)

Reflections on now…

I find myself now in a place forced to stay some what less mobile (an understatement), than this fiercely independent woman is accustomed to enduring. My bottom line has always been, I just don’t stay down well. I’ve always had to do for myself in life, and my daughter, as I raised her alone. So what to do now that I am in this forced state of limited mobility?

The universe sometimes gives us a shove when a gentle push doesn’t work anymore… I’ve now been gifted with the time to clean up some serious procrastinations that have been hanging up my life.

That’s the blessing… If there is one to be seen in this mess…

First, I am taking some time and heeding the message that sometimes when the going gets tough, the tough do need to slow down and take some time to heal.

(Photo: Reflection Through the Trees at Hellcat Swamp ~ c. Pamela J. Leavey 2012)

A few weeks ago I joined the ranks of the unemployed and took to walking 3 – 5 days a week with a dear friend, to clear my head and get grounded. There’s nothing better for freeing your mind than a brisk walk in the cool winter air.

Most of my walks were spent exploring the many trails and pathways at the Parker River National Wildlife Refuge. The Hellcat Swamps trails have become a favorite, from the observation tower on the Parker River side to the 50 foot dune on the ocean side.

My hikes abruptly stopped on January 8, after a fall in my driveway left me with abrasions, bruises and a badly sprained foot. The following day I ended up with a cast on my right foot which needless to say has kept me from the hikes and trails. The cast is scheduled to come off on January 23 and I am hoping to get the okay from the doctor to start hiking again.

The photo above is from the observation deck atop the 50 foot dune mentioned above. From the top of the dune on clear day, the Isles of Shoals and Mount Agamenticus in York, Maine are visible.

The Parker River National Wildlife Refuge is a birder’s paradise and during the past weeks spent there I have come to think of myself as a birder too. My heart and soul fill with sheer delight when I spot a Red Tail, Rough Legged or Harrier Hawk. And the Mute Swans simply fill my heart with radiant love.

The day before my fall my friend and I were blessed to witness the flight of four Mute Swans from the edge of the Parker River and then up and over the observation tower at Hellcat Swamp. Flying a mere 8 – 10 feet overhead, the sound of their wings beating was like the primordial beat of the mother’s heart (the Great Mother Goddess)… Thump… Thump… Thump.

Ah… but there was more… We watched their magical, mystical dance through the air as they swooped down towards the northern end of the swamp and then they rose again. Up… up… up and swirl back towards the observation tower. We stood awash in the magic of watching the swans fly overhead, not once but twice, before landing back where they started from. And we knew that their flight was a gift from the Goddess.

I maybe grounded right now from hiking (and driving) but every time I think of those swans flying overhead, I feel their blessings and I know they will be there to greet me when I return back to the Parker River Path.

I finally added a new photo album of photos “In The Secret Garden” to my photo gallery. There’s still many to edit and add but I hope readers will check out the album here: The Secret Garden.

(Photo: Quan Yin In The Secret Garden ~~ c. Pamela J. Leavey 2011)

Newburyport’s harbor as seen from the mouth of the Merrimack River…

(Photo: c. Pamela J. Leavey 2011)

Abandoned 50 gallon drums at the mouth of the Merrimack River in Newburyport…

(Photo: Plum Island Drums © Pamela J. Leavey 2011)