There are troubles, that brew in my heart and mind, which are weightier than the stones stacked precariously upon each other forming centuries old walls across the landscape. I question the existence of my troubles as I question where did these stone walls come from?
Who moved these stones from place to place to build these walls that block my path? Who took these stones from the earth and stacked them just so, creating boundaries where once there were none.
I am a woman with few boundaries, except when it comes to my heart, which I shield with stone walls, keeping love a bay. This is my truth, though I rarely speak it.
We use nature to our liking, as people use each other. We take from nature and we tend to not give back. This mimics the patterns of my failed relationships with men. I give, they take. I stack a few more stones upon the wall. It gets higher. I become more reclusive, knowing full well I build my barriers to that which I desire.
Here in lies the problem to the troubles we all feel. Whether we build stone walls to protect ourselves from love or money, we each create walls in our lives in the areas that sometimes we most desire. This is the dichotomy of the self, is it not?
We stack our troubles like stone walls, precariously, we place one stone upon another. Surely those stones will tumble and crumble if we let down our guard. Yet, we continue to stack, small stones upon large stones until the wall represents the barrier to our self, and our longings and desires.
What if we start to slowly take apart our walls. What if we let nature run her course, and we allow the forces greater than our self to tear down our walls. What if we show a little weakness in the face of what we desire. What if we let nature and the Universe do what they will and we surrender to that higher power. What if?